When we are struggling in our lives, it's quite easy to become needy and ask for a lot of help from others. Or to sink into despair because you can't seem to find a way out. Strangely enough, if there isn't much you can do for yourself, helping somebody out is a sure way to get in a better mood or even have the situation resolve itself completely.
I know a lot of people are quite surprised by this - but the good energy that gets created when you help out others - always helps out us as well. There are many things we can receive from helping others: satisfaction, feelings of accomplishments, happiness, joy, gratitude, gifts, but also inspiration or help with our own troubles. You might even hear yourself give advice that you need to take as well. Research has shown that altruistic behavior gives significant rewards, so if you feel stuck in your own life, put on your helping boots and you will see changes come to you soon.
We aren't always in the position where we can go and help out, the way we want. Sometimes we have constraints physically, mentally or emotionally, but time or monetary constraints also might mean we can't do all that we want. So that's why I wrote an exercise on how to help energetically, from your own home.
A good thing to remember is that we can always send energetic help. Be mindful about what your own ethical boundaries are. Some people feel free to send all kinds of help or even try to solve the situation, while others just sent light or energy, or ask heavenly helpers to send support.
Exercise: Helping out others energetically
- Make sure you have around 15-20 minutes undisturbed
- Take some time to get into a relaxed state of mind.
- Breathe in and out a couple of times
- Focus on the person you want to help
- Visualize the help you are sending or state your intention
- Allow the help to flow from Heaven towards you and then from you towards the person OR visualize the help flowing directly towards the other person
- Take some time to get back into your body
- Eat or drink something or do a grounding exercise
Want to talk about different types of energetic help or share a story? Post a comment on the blog, Facebook Fan Page or talk to me in the practice.
Dear People,
Sometimes people ask me how they can support me and my work which is always a wonderful question to answer. I'm grateful that people are such fans of the work I do, that they want to spread the word and make sure my business prospers. There are many simple ways in which you can help, so if you never thought about this before, here are some things you can do.
Recommend me to others
Talk to other people about your results with me and how happy you are about them. When people ask about the positive changes they see in you, tell them you have had a session with me. For some people it might feel a bit embarrassing to do so. However, we all want our loved one's to feel better too, so it's a win-win situation. They get access to another way of healing and I get new clients.
Visit me with a friend
I have always offered free evenings in which you can come and meet me, find out more about the work I do, experience Healings or Readings in a group and ask me questions about my work. It's a joy to be able to offer this to existing clients and their friends, but also to new people.
I heard often that people say that they don't want to take these slots, because they feel they are only for new people, but that was never my intention. These evenings originated when existing clients asked me about possibilities to introduce me to others. So I took that suggestion and turned it into the free evenings & allowing people to bring a guest. Meeting me with a friend might be just what they needed and I am happy to provide that.
Buy a gift certificate
If you think I can help somebody else and you want to offer them a session, you can buy a gift certificate. I can make them out to any amount or just put "1 free session" or "1 free Reading" if that's what you want. I don't really advertise much with this, but I do have a wonderful graphic for a digital certificate or I can print one out for you.
Join my socials
I do not have a huge social media presence, but joining the Facebook Fan Page, following the Blog or joining the mailing list really helps me. Nowadays even publishers check out how big your online audience is. Of course, it's fun for you too, as you keep in touch with me, my work, the latest news and some great offers.
Write a review
When you are looking for something or somebody, I'm sure you check out reviews. They help make an informed choice, so leaving one for me helps show that my sessions are worthwhile. If you have the time, you can leave one on the Facebook Fan Page, LinkedIn or through Google Reviews.
Give me feedback
I love hearing your happy stories and sometimes I do use them in testimonials on the website (with permission of course). I love being able to use people's own words instead of using anonymized examples.
I also take all feedback very seriously, because everybody has something to teach me. I might not be able to follow up on your suggestions, but I do appreciate them. A lot of clients have given me wonderful ideas in the past and have helped me learn how to be more effective.
You can give me feedback by filling in the feedback form you get from me, but also by just sending me an e-mail or calling me.
I'm sure there are other ways of support I'm forgetting and I want to reiterate how grateful I am to all of my clients who have graced me with their presence. I love the work I do and thank you for reading this article.
Often we find ourselves torn between two different parts of ourselves. Maybe we feel like our heart is craving something else then our head is telling us, maybe it's the 'good girl' wanting to do one thing while the 'lazy bum' wants to do another. Often, we are split, which is causing great damage to our energy and well being.
Past splits, like decisions about staying or leaving a relationship, job or country, can still haunt us as well. You can notice this when you have regrets, resentment or pain that you know is rooted in a past decision.
Today I'm sharing an exercise designed to integrate both sides of yourself, by giving them what they need, so you can step into a new beginning. I've done this exercise with a group of people at the free healing evening in October and it was very well received. A lot of people noticed immediate feelings of peacefulness, but also recognized how stuck they have become into the conflict so the middle road was invisible to them.
Exercise Inner Conflict Integration
This exercise is designed to do with two people, however, if you want to do it on your own, you can stand in both roles for yourself. I highly recommend that you then choose a Deck, like my 100% Positivity Set, to receive the Gift necessary, instead of listening to your own intuition. It's very hard to heal your own conflict so getting some extra help is recommended.
Role A: Conflicted Person
Role B: Helping Hand
A identifies the conflict and discusses it with B (or if you are doing this on your own, you discuss this situation out loud).
First, A, energetically enters one side of the conflict by taking a step to the left, sharing the thoughts, feelings, or behavior that comes with this part. You can feel the influence this side has on your energy by the feelings in your physical body, energy body or shifts in your emotional and mental state. Discuss this out loud.
B, asks God, your higher Self, Angels or anyone else to come and help out, but you can also help A from a higher Self perspective, your own experiences or by drawing a Card. First absorb the energy for yourself before you bring it to A. Name what you are bringing and step into the conflicted side to bring this new energy, gift or advice into this side.
Stay together for a moment and let the energy flow until you feel that it is ready.
A steps over the "middle point", to the right, the other side of the conflict. B moves to the opposite position so you are facing each other again.
A shares the thoughts, feelings and behavior that belongs to this conflict side. Take the time again to really feel what this side of the conflict is doing to you, what it needs or what part of you is invested in it.
B, this time brings the gift to side 2, to bring peace and love there. Again, first name the gift, accept it for yourself before bringing it to A.
Just stand quietly together and let the energy flow until it feels ready.
A then steps back to the middle, the starting point of the exercise. B can stand by A or just behind A. A makes a conscious decision to take a step forward to end the conflict and integrate both gifts into a new beginning. When creating this new beginning, you can find insights, inspiration or changes in your behavior.
Want to work on your own inner conflict or share a story on how this exercise has helped you? Leave a message on the blog, the Facebook Fan Page or e-mail me.
Dear People,
Quite recently I've changed the way I've been doing healing work in my practice. I've heard a lot of questions about my old way and my new way. So what better time then to sit down and write a blog post about it. If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me in the practice, by e-mail or leave a message below this blog post or on Facebook.
Why did you change?
We all learn and grow during life. I have always told people I let God guide me to where I need to be and what I need to do. I can't tell people to move forward in their soul missions, if I do not do so myself. It's important for me to work authentically.
Does that mean that the old way was wrong?
Most definitely not. I have had beautiful miracles with my old way of working. I wouldn't have traded those for the world. I loved working with my gifts in that way, but I felt that I could do more if I switched to a new way.
What are the differences between the old and the new way?
The most obvious one is that in the old way people would lay down on the massage table while I treated them and in the new way I ask people to stand and move with me. I feel that physically moving helps the energy shift easier and more naturally.
In the old way I would remove the blockages in the energy field and ask people to repeat what I was saying. I would listen intuitively to what they would need to hear/need to say and often people would ask me if I was reading their minds, because they would feel heard. Repeating it before and after healing would give most people the feeling that things have shifted as they would notice changes in their tone of voice or body.
In the new way, I will ask people to stand in different positions and then ask them what they are experiencing. I engage their intuitive gifts which helps them to get really in touch with the energy and feel how things are shifting. By asking to move forward during healing, what we are doing integrates more and deeper. I can add in energy as needed as well as feel intuitively which positions are needed.
In the old way I would resolve most blockages in the energy field or in heart/head layers, meaning most inner conflicts would resolve, energy would be boosted and behavior would change. Sometimes we'd work on other layers or energy would work there on it's own. However, for difficult problems or chronic problems, I usually had to work at least 5-7 sessions and some problems would be very hard to shift.
In the new way, we work directly on the root, even if that is based on earlier experiences, family patterns, past lives or archetype imbalances. That means I can work a lot deeper and in more layers then ever before. By walking through those layers with people, they gain enormous new insights about themselves and how this problem has started. It gives immediately relief and helps them to also heal family members or other parties involved. Most people need only 1 session.
In the old way, the energy boost would be around 2-3 weeks for most people.
In the new way, I've heard people still feeling it 6-8 weeks later, as well as reporting more blessings, harmony and joy in their lives.
With the new sessions people have told me that they have received important insights that feel rooted within them, felt energy shift in themselves and most importantly report a lot of miracles and shifts in the outside world as well. It's lovely to see how much positive change these sessions bring.
Will you never work in the old way anymore?
I will never say never, because I do not know what life will bring. I'm phasing out this part of my work now, hoping to finish up work with people at the end of 2019. If I feel called to work beyond that, I will do so and I'm called again in the future, I will find a way to start again.
Why is the new way more expensive?
Obviously a lot of people understand that if I work more powerfully and faster, I need to raise prices. If not, I would go broke very soon. For every new client that finds me, I have to advertise, promote, do intakes, answer e-mails etc. If I work 6 times faster for the same price, I'd have to find 6 times more clients without any extra resources. Frankly, that's not possible without me going into burnout, which would mean I can't help anybody.
I asked God what the new price would be and even though I had difficulty with it in the beginning, I trust that it's the right way. I feel I'm still asking less then the true value of these sessions and the very positive responses from clients seem to agree with me.
Will you have more changes?
Of course, because life is ever changing. I'm planning on doing more group work and moving forward with my books and other projects.
So, keep yourself up to date by following the blog or Facebook Fan Page or by receiving the news letter.
Dear people,
Often we find ourselves struggling with difficult patterns that we can also see repeated in our own family. We might even reinforce them by saying: "Oh, we are all "insert problematic behavior", which means that it becomes even harder to free ourselves. Family wounds can travel throughout generations, in changes of behavior, outlook, thought patterns and health issues. We can however, become trailblazers and free ourselves and our family. We can say: "It stops here" and not burden ourselves and younger generations with old pain, heartbreak or traps.
Remember that often, unhealthy family patterns have two unbalanced sides. So when there is a family pattern around sex, some family members have too much of it/history of assaults while others have too little. When there is an unhealthy pattern around money, some people are spending recklessly while others are super stingy. It's rare to see a balanced pattern, because we feel deep loyalty sometimes to continue the pattern.
Time to free your family and yourself with this excellent exercise.
Often we find ourselves struggling with difficult patterns that we can also see repeated in our own family. We might even reinforce them by saying: "Oh, we are all "insert problematic behavior", which means that it becomes even harder to free ourselves. Family wounds can travel throughout generations, in changes of behavior, outlook, thought patterns and health issues. We can however, become trailblazers and free ourselves and our family. We can say: "It stops here" and not burden ourselves and younger generations with old pain, heartbreak or traps.
Remember that often, unhealthy family patterns have two unbalanced sides. So when there is a family pattern around sex, some family members have too much of it/history of assaults while others have too little. When there is an unhealthy pattern around money, some people are spending recklessly while others are super stingy. It's rare to see a balanced pattern, because we feel deep loyalty sometimes to continue the pattern.
Time to free your family and yourself with this excellent exercise.
Family Freedom Exercise
Take around 30-45 minutes of uninterrupted time to do this exercise. All you need is pen and paper, but a set of cards with positive gifts can also help.
Question 1: Which family pattern do you see?
Could be anything that you want to work on, ranging from health issues, to issues around relationships, money, assertiveness etc.
Could be anything that you want to work on, ranging from health issues, to issues around relationships, money, assertiveness etc.
Question 2a: What is the first unbalanced side
What has made you believe that this is a problem, what type of hurt, wounds or pain do you see surrounding this pattern.
Question 2b: What is the second unbalanced side
Question 2b: What is the second unbalanced side
What is the second unbalanced side, that moves in the direct opposite of what is going on, but is still problematic.
Question 3a: Who in the living family has it/which side or both of it?
This helps you check how many generations are burdened by this and if it's your mothers side of the family, your fathers side of the family or both.
Question 3b: How many generations has this been going on?
You might know through stories of your grandparents or other family how long this pattern has been going on. If you don't know, you can ask intuitively. Don't be surprised if you reach high numbers like 5-6 generations back or even longer.
Question 3b: How many generations has this been going on?
You might know through stories of your grandparents or other family how long this pattern has been going on. If you don't know, you can ask intuitively. Don't be surprised if you reach high numbers like 5-6 generations back or even longer.
Question 4: What is the balanced pattern?
Since you know both sides of the extreme, it's important to recognize what the balanced healthy way would be. You might recognize it in others around you, who don't have this family pattern or you might ask intuitively what is the right and healthy way.
Question 5: What times/moments has this pattern harmed you, that you need to let go of
Since this pattern has been active in your life, you might remember several examples that you have felt the harm. I recommend you write down a short summary or create just the title for the moments that have been meaningful.
Healing the first break
Intuitively ask what happened at the first ancestor who has brought this pattern into being. Was it a man or a woman? What was going on there, what heart break or pain occurred that they moved into this unhealthy pattern? What was the actual lesson and what is the gift?
Embrace the gift and surround your ancestor with love. You can ask for help from your guides, heaven or other spiritual helpers to achieve this.
Healing the family
Instead of the wound, imagine the gift moving from your ancestor throughout your family, going down generations, but also sideways (so also uncles/aunts/cousins etc), receiving this blessing, until it reaches you. Have it passed down from your conception all the way through your current age and see how it heals the moments that you have described in question 5. Pass it on to next generations if those are existing.
Since this pattern has been active in your life, you might remember several examples that you have felt the harm. I recommend you write down a short summary or create just the title for the moments that have been meaningful.
Healing the first break
Intuitively ask what happened at the first ancestor who has brought this pattern into being. Was it a man or a woman? What was going on there, what heart break or pain occurred that they moved into this unhealthy pattern? What was the actual lesson and what is the gift?
Embrace the gift and surround your ancestor with love. You can ask for help from your guides, heaven or other spiritual helpers to achieve this.
Healing the family
Instead of the wound, imagine the gift moving from your ancestor throughout your family, going down generations, but also sideways (so also uncles/aunts/cousins etc), receiving this blessing, until it reaches you. Have it passed down from your conception all the way through your current age and see how it heals the moments that you have described in question 5. Pass it on to next generations if those are existing.
Creating the right narrative
Now that this pattern is healed, create a small story of 2-3 lines that affirms that you are now a family of "insert healthy behavior". You will be surprised to see that lives will start shifting around you, as well as your own.
Want to talk to me about family patterns or want a little help to heal your family? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your stories or questions in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
Now that this pattern is healed, create a small story of 2-3 lines that affirms that you are now a family of "insert healthy behavior". You will be surprised to see that lives will start shifting around you, as well as your own.
Want to talk to me about family patterns or want a little help to heal your family? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your stories or questions in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
Letting go continues to be a big topic in my own life, but also in the life of clients. Often they come to me because they are stuck in a rut, stuck in old pain or stuck in other ways. Letting go is supposed to be the most natural thing. Moving forward into your journey, you can't hold on to everything. And when your hands are full with the old, you can't accept the new.
Even so, it's often a struggle for people to let go and moving forward from the ways of the old, towards the new beginning is a natural process that sometimes needs an easier transition. So I'm writing down some exercises to make it easier for people to let go.
Letting go of old items
When we keep the old in our lives, our houses, cars and workplaces will overflow with things. A cluttered life drags us down, but even so, it can be really hard to let go of things. I prefer to ask myself the following three questions about letting go:
- Do I need to pass it on towards somebody else who will love it, like I used to love it? (Think selling, gifting or donating it)
- Do I need to acknowledge that it's broken, it's service to me has passed and it needs to be released? If so, I usually honor it by speaking gratefully or I sometimes make a photo to commemorate something.
- Do I need to be honest that this item, that I bought for a purpose didn't get that purpose realized and that I have changed and grown since then? It's hard to realize that that instrument you bought or that hobby you did isn't something you want to invest time in anymore. It's good to mourn that dream, realize it's no longer yours and move towards selling, gifting or donating it.
Sometimes people have passed from our lives and yet we still think of them or miss them. It might be impossible to get them back (passed away) or a bad idea (toxic relationships). Often we miss part of them, that beautiful part, that we can't let go. However, the more we hold on, the less likely we are to build fulfilling bonds with others.
A simple exercise to letting go of bonds is the following:
- Send gratitude and love towards the other person for being in your life for the time that they were
- Acknowledge that letting go is in the best interest of both parties. If you still feel rejection, loss or heartbreak, acknowledge that they have the right to surround themselves with people that they feel right in and that you are not it. Free them to be their best selves, so you can be your best self. Ask for the lesson
- Acknowledge the space they leave - a new place is born for somebody else. Even though this lack might feel uncomfortable, in time, a better deeper healthier and lovelier bond will grow
We all pick up identities as we grow through life. Common one's are student, child and work titles, but identities can also be centered around hobby's like soccer player or guitarist. We need to shed these identities sometimes as we naturally transition into someone else. When we don't shed them, we will continue to behave as an old identity or feel trapped within ourselves, instead of free to discover who we are and free to stand in our truth.
We only identify that strongly with something because it has held our love, our energy and our attention. Still, willingly or unwillingly, we move out of identities as well. So it's natural to mourn a little at a transition, while at the same time being excited and happy for the new.
If we didn't transition naturally, you will find that you either hoard old stuff connected to the identity or you hide them all away, because the loss is painful.
A loving exercise to transition into the truth of you is the following:
- Acknowledge transitions that you have gone through like child, teenager, adult and how each stage brought you joys and gifts. You might also have transitions like student/worker or single/committed relationship.
- Look gently at the identities that you haven't let go off and that you know you should. Recognize that if you move into the truth, you will receive the joys of the new stage(s). Love yourself where you are at.
- If you feel like it's too sad to acknowledge the transition, ask Heaven, your Guide or Higher Self what the gift is for you. Give it to yourself with love.
- Your transition is complete if you can look with love and gratitude upon the old identity and with joy and excitement onto the new (undiscovered) one.
I've been writing EFT sentences for a quite a while now, but it's time to say goodbye. I haven't used EFT for a long time in my practice. I always loved the technique, but it has had significant drawbacks as well. People have trouble finding the tapping points, finding their root issues to work on and formulating the right sentences. I will be moving forward with different techniques that fit me and my work better.
So today will be the last time I'm writing some EFT sentences. I saw it is article 25, which is also a lovely number to say goodbye on. You are of course always welcome to ask me for sentences after a session if you want to continue to use this technique.
Processing endings
Even though I feel sad to say goodbye, I choose to move on
Even though I feel upset with this ending, I honor the lesson
Even though I'm resisting this ending, I choose to love myself
Even though I'm angry with this ending, I choose to forgive
Even though I'm not willing to say goodbye, I trust the process
Honoring the process
Even though I want to fight this ending, I choose to honor the process
Even though I want things to stay as they were, I choose to honor the process
Even though I wasn't ready yet to let go, I choose to honor the process
Even though I was upset with this ending, I choose to honor the process
Even though I'm unhappy with this ending, I choose to honor the process
Even though I'm struggling with this ending, I choose to honor the process
Kindness in transition
Even though I feel overwhelmed with this ending, I'm kind in this transition
Even though I feel frustrated with this ending, I'm kind in this transition
Even though I'm in pain due to this ending, I'm kind in this transition
Even though I'm assigning blame, I'm kind in this transition
Even though I'm fearful, I'm kind in this transition
Time for the new
Even though this ending was unexpected, I'm ready for a new and better path
Even though this ending was shocking, I'm ready for a new and better path
Even though this ending was a long time coming, I'm ready for a new and better path
Even though this ending was upsetting, I"m ready for a new and better path
Want to chat about EFT and endings? Post a message on the blog, Facebook Fan Page or e-mail me for a personalized EFT sentence!
Dear People,
I meet a lot of people in my practice who are deeply sensitive and emphatic. Being emphatic is a lovely trait and it can really uplift your life. It’s easy for you to be spread love, connect to others and deepen wisdom. On the other end Empathic people often fall in the trap of dismissing their own feelings, wants, needs and desires.
When you are empathic on a deep level, emotions of other people will be felt deeply as well. If your energy field is strong, you will not receive the emotional energy of others. If it’s weakened by lack of self-care, illness or other reasons, you might notice yourself starting to cry even when you aren’t that sad, stay angry or frustrated and not knowing way and feeling this emotional energy of others.
I help people strengthen their field, because while it’s lovely to be empathic, we should not be sponges and suck up all emotional energy. It’s not ours and it will deplete your own energy, make you feel tired or have you thinking that you have really mercurial moods.
Emphatic people should be able to look into the pool and see what’s going on emotionally, without falling into it and drowning in emotion. I teach different techniques to help recognize which emotions are ours, how to release other people’s emotions and how to make sure you aren’t drowning.
However, sometimes empathic people will choose to ignore their own feelings in favor of other people’s feelings. Somebody might make a request of them and they feel the desire, pain or loss, and want to step up and fulfil this request, regardless of the costs. While you can’t reduce the strength of emotions of what the other person gives out, we can choose to reduce ours. If we do so, it’s often because we repress or dismiss our own emotions.
This type of sacrifice of ourselves diminishes us and it will cause much more problems down the road. Sacrifice means that it looks like things are going better, because the other person is happy, but there is no net gain. What the other person gains, we lose (else it wouldn’t be a sacrifice!). On top of that, our resentment and anger and having to sacrifice will come back to the surface one way or another. That means that even this temporary gain will most likely end up in a loss.
Empathic people often feel taken advantage off, but when we look honestly, it’s us that choose to ignore ourselves. So what to do about it? When you are mindful of what happens when you do this, it becomes easier to stop doing it. When you recognize the idea: “Another persons emergency isn’t always mine”, it helps to keep some emotional distance. When you remember that it might feel very dire, but that doesn’t mean it actually is.
If you still have a choice to see what needs to be done or are considering doing something, this following exercise is a good way to stay with yourself and out of sacrifice.
Exercise Acknowledge all Feelings
I meet a lot of people in my practice who are deeply sensitive and emphatic. Being emphatic is a lovely trait and it can really uplift your life. It’s easy for you to be spread love, connect to others and deepen wisdom. On the other end Empathic people often fall in the trap of dismissing their own feelings, wants, needs and desires.
When you are empathic on a deep level, emotions of other people will be felt deeply as well. If your energy field is strong, you will not receive the emotional energy of others. If it’s weakened by lack of self-care, illness or other reasons, you might notice yourself starting to cry even when you aren’t that sad, stay angry or frustrated and not knowing way and feeling this emotional energy of others.
I help people strengthen their field, because while it’s lovely to be empathic, we should not be sponges and suck up all emotional energy. It’s not ours and it will deplete your own energy, make you feel tired or have you thinking that you have really mercurial moods.
Emphatic people should be able to look into the pool and see what’s going on emotionally, without falling into it and drowning in emotion. I teach different techniques to help recognize which emotions are ours, how to release other people’s emotions and how to make sure you aren’t drowning.
However, sometimes empathic people will choose to ignore their own feelings in favor of other people’s feelings. Somebody might make a request of them and they feel the desire, pain or loss, and want to step up and fulfil this request, regardless of the costs. While you can’t reduce the strength of emotions of what the other person gives out, we can choose to reduce ours. If we do so, it’s often because we repress or dismiss our own emotions.
This type of sacrifice of ourselves diminishes us and it will cause much more problems down the road. Sacrifice means that it looks like things are going better, because the other person is happy, but there is no net gain. What the other person gains, we lose (else it wouldn’t be a sacrifice!). On top of that, our resentment and anger and having to sacrifice will come back to the surface one way or another. That means that even this temporary gain will most likely end up in a loss.
Empathic people often feel taken advantage off, but when we look honestly, it’s us that choose to ignore ourselves. So what to do about it? When you are mindful of what happens when you do this, it becomes easier to stop doing it. When you recognize the idea: “Another persons emergency isn’t always mine”, it helps to keep some emotional distance. When you remember that it might feel very dire, but that doesn’t mean it actually is.
If you still have a choice to see what needs to be done or are considering doing something, this following exercise is a good way to stay with yourself and out of sacrifice.
Exercise Acknowledge all Feelings
- Take two sheets and a pen and make sure you have around 15 minutes uninterrupted time.
- On the first sheet, write down all the feelings of the other person involved in the situation. Write down the emotions as big as you feel them, so PAIN might be capitalized or written on half the page.
- On the second sheet, start writing down your own emotions, also writing them down as big as you feel them.
You might notice that it’s much easier to write down the emotions of the other person, if this is the case, that means that much of your energy is direct at or even in the other persons energy field. That’s not the way it should be, so ask Heaven, your Guides, your High Self or any other Spiritual ally to bring back your energy to yourself.
Now that your energy is with yourself where it belongs, look over your own sheet. Place a hand on the sheet and the other hand on your heart. Acknowledge each of the feelings that are written down. You can literally say: “I acknowledge my sadness” or just name the feelings. As you name them bit by bit, you might feel that some of them transform. When we spend time with our feelings we recognise their messages and then we can easily let them go. You might recognise why you feel these feelings particular or how this situation reminds you of the past.
After you have acknowledged your feelings, gently release the paper in the way you see fit. You might want to burn it, recycle it, tear it into pieces. Do the same with the other sheet. The way forwards should be clear now, but if not, ask your Spiritual ally to resolve this situation towards everybody’s highest good. Be mindful of what your intuition tells you in the next couple of days.
Want to chat about your empathic gifts or ask for advice? Don't hesitate to post it in
a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share
your stories or questions in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
Today I'm writing some EFT sentences about dreams. Dreams can really help us understand what is subconsciously going on in our lives. Recurring dreams can be quite upsetting, but even regular dreams can keep us upset during the day. Dreams are strong influences and it's great to consciously process them and reap their benefits for your waking life: understanding and healing.
What better way then to use some EFT sentences? If you are seeking more understand, don't hesitate to use a dream journal or a dream dictionary to understand the symbolism of dreams.
Processing Dream Feelings
Even though I feel very sad after this dream, I choose to be at peace
Even though I feel very angry after this dream, I choose to be at peace
Even though I feel very upset after this dream, I choose to be at peace
Even though I feel very frustrated after this dream, I choose to be at peace
Even though I feel very lonely after this dream, I choose to be at peace
Even though I feel very stressed after this dream, I choose to be at peace
Even though this dream keeps me from feeling free, I choose to be at peace
Processing your Dream
Even though I don't remember my dream, I choose to learn my lesson
Even though I barely remember my dream, I choose to learn my lesson
Even though I don't understand my dream, I choose to learn my lesson
Even though I don't know why I dream this, I choose to learn my lesson
Even though I don't know why I am dreaming this all the time, I choose to learn my lesson
Even though I got upset about my dream, I choose to learn my lesson
Even though I feel wounded by my dream, I choose to learn my lesson
Understanding your dream
Even though I don't know why I am dreaming this, I choose to understand
Even though I hate dreaming this (again), I choose to understand
Even though I don't understand my dram, I choose to understand
Even though I don't want to dream this, I choose to understand
Even though I don't understand symbol X in my dream, I choose to listen
Even though I don't understand happening Y in my dream, I choose to listen
Healing with your dream
Even though this dream has shown me a wound, I choose to heal
Even though this dream is upsetting, I choose to heal
Even though I don't understand my wound, I choose to heal
Even though I don't know why I'm dreaming about this, I choose to heal
Want to chat about dreams in a healing way? Post a message on the blog, Facebook Fan Page or e-mail me for a personalized EFT sentence!
Dear People,
The last two years I’ve been following workshops at PoV, Psychology of Vision, which was founded by Chuck and Lency Spezzano. My first contact with Chuck Spezzano’s work was when I received the Love Pack from a friend. This deck with Relationships Dynamics was very interesting and helpful. Some of you might have seen it in my practice or received Readings from it.
Throughout the years I bought 2 other Oracle Sets and have used them extensively. While Chuck has also wrote many books (English and German), I do not currently own any. He has written about many dynamics in relationships, but also about enlightenment, healing and other subjects.
Three years ago when I received a small inheritance I decided that I wanted to use part of it for my personal development so I wanted to do a workshop with his organization. Sadly, when I looked for workshops within Europe, I only saw workshops in Germany, Austria and Switzerland. My German is abysmal and since he has a lot of books in German, I was under the mistaken impression he speaks German in these workshops.
I opted to a 5-day workshop in England, with the sister organization Visionworks for Life instead. They use the same principles but work in a slightly different way. I loved the workshop there and we took the opportunity to see Stonehenge and many beautiful sights. I met somebody at the workshop who told me that the workshops are not in fact only in German, but that there is a translator there and they will translate from German to English for Chuck and from English to German for the participants.
That meant that doing a workshop in Germany, Switzerland or Austria was a possibility so in 2018 I followed two 3-day workshops with Chuck. Those were lovely and I returned home with new ideas, a deeper sense of peace and well being and more techniques to practice. This year I had the opportunity to do a 8 day workshops in the south of Germany which was specifically geared towards healing. Participants come from all walks of life (so not only people in the spiritual field or therapist) and age ranges.
I was privileged to meet a lot of wonderful people, be part of two shamanic ceremonies because Shamans were there, learn new techniques and heal myself.
A workshop consists of the main group, with whom we meet daily usually between 10.00-19.00 (with breaks). During main group time, we have a focus person who will lead the way for the group in a particular issue (that the focus person has present in their life and people in the group in their own way as well). We also have some dancing after breaks to keep the energy up. Chuck will also tell stories, explain theory and exercises to be done with your smaller group and/or your buddy. Joining is also done within the main group, which is a 1 on 1 exercise done to music.
The smaller group consists of at least 1 trainer of the organization, some participants and sometimes an additional (assistant) trainer. So far the group has ranged between 6-8 people in my workshops. Fate/Heaven/God gets to decide who is in your group, as they will draw the names of participants for each group. Exercises done with the smaller group are usually done in longer breaks and sometimes after the end of the workshop (depending on how much time they take/what the group decides).
In your smaller group, there is 1 (or 2 if they have an uneven number of participants) person who is considered your buddy. This buddy can be somebody who mirrors you (has the opposite dynamics), somebody who is just like you (struggling with the same things/has similarities in family, hobby’s, life experiences), is somebody who you have an unresolved issue with (reminds you of your boss/family member etc.), is somebody who is your shadow (has all the things you deny/hate about yourself) or is your angel (who can help you with everything, makes you feel blessed). This buddy is somebody who you do exercises with and the idea this person is the perfect person for you to learn with/from.
It’s hard to explain everything that’s done in the workshop, especially because each workshops depends on what the focus people bring in, what the group brings in and what you yourself do during your exercises.
PoV works a lot with family dynamics, past lives, astral and spiritual experiences and your own agency as well as with many spiritual teachers, God and Heaven. It doesn’t shy away from Shadow Work, taking accountability for your experiences and wishing above all to heal.
If you are interested in following such a workshop and want to ask me more questions, please send me message by e-mail or ask me in my practice.
Dear People,
A while ago I talked to several people about the differences between approval, understanding and love. When we are kids, our parents approval equal to their love, as we receive rewards and kindness when they approve of our behavior. Understanding seems also very closely linked to care, as we seem to think that when people understand us they care and if they care, they'd understand us. Sometimes people feel that if you understand, you'd approve, but that isn't always the case.
Seeing these three as separate entities will help you receive the love people have for you, even if you don't get their approval or understanding
Approval
Approval literally means the action of approving something or the belief that something is good or acceptable. If you look back upon your own life, you might have found actions from your loved one's that you didn't approve off, while it didn't negate or diminish your love for them at all. An extreme form of disapproval for example is that we all know that people do not approve of drug use, but you need only look at how devastated families with an addict in it are to recognize that there certainly is love involved.
It's also extremely interesting to see who you feel you need approval from. If you still need your parents approval, then on some level, it almost always means that you want their love instead. Focus on why you haven't felt their love, connect to their love and you will notice your need for approval will disappear. If you want the approval of your boss, your partner or your child, you might have issues with self-confidence or self-worth.
Next time when somebody disapproves of you, notice how it affects you and recognize that you still have their love. Focus on that path you want to walk and the human being you want to be. Often people disapprove of what they conceive are risks that are too great, but that are absolutely right for the person involved. Also freely understand that when you disapprove of something, you are still able to love the person.
Understanding
Understanding literally means sympathetic awareness or tolerance. It means that you can empathize with somebody, but doesn't mean that you approve or give zero consequences. So people can understand that you are late because you overslept, but still make a note on your record.
Asking for people's understanding and then trying to force them to 'see it your way', 'to approve' or 'to prove that they care' is a losing battle. People often freely give their understanding, but still don't approve as they would have made different choices themselves. They might understand, but still be disappointed that you didn't follow through or expect you to still do what you said.
If you try to use understanding to control others, you are missing an essential point. They are still being sympathetic to you, they still show care, they are just not doing what you want based on that understanding. Accept their loving understanding and recognize that sometimes you will receive understanding and love, but not approval. Remind yourself how often you've been understanding, but still wanted consequences for the other person.
Want to talk about approval, love and understanding? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your stories or questions in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
Dear People,
A lot of us know that we should keep healthy boundaries and that this will greatly improve our lives. Even so, it can be hard as we can bow down towards guilt, obligation, fear or social pressure. So today I'm writing some affirmations to help keep boundaries strong and healthy.
I write my affirmations in different levels so you can see what resonates with you and what you want to work on. You might start with a lower level that resonates and then move your way up.
Pick and choose what works for you and affirm away (I recommend three times a day if you can manage it).
I give myself the right to have boundaries
I gift myself boundaries
I gift others boundaries
I'm willing to create healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to have healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to listen to my healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to protect my healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I'm willing to re-asses my healthy boundaries in all aspects of my life
I set healthy boundaries with my boss
I set healthy boundaries with colleagues
I set healthy boundaries with clients
I set healthy boundaries with companies/competitors
I set healthy boundaries at work
I respect the healthy boundaries of my body
I respect the healthy boundaries of my heart
I respect the healthy boundaries of my mind
I respect the healthy boundaries of my spirit
I set healthy boundaries for myself
I set healthy boundaries in my social life
I set healthy boundaries with my friends
I set healthy boundaries with my family
I set healthy boundaries with my partner
I set healthy boundaries with my children
I set healthy boundaries with others
I protect my healthy boundaries
I easily protect my healthy boundaries
I joyfully protect my healthy boundaries
I give myself the freedom of healthy boundaries
Have an affirmation you want to share? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your affirmation stories in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
A lot of people have experience with enjoying the Flow, that time when you feel strong healthy and vibrant and everything is just flowing like it should. Your focus is happy and in the moment and things just seamlessly fall into place. As a Psychic I don't only work with that type of Flow, but also with different types of energies that I also call flow. Today I'm writing to you how I do that and give you two exercises to try for yourself.
Flow of your life
Just as everybody else I always have projects, wants and needs in my life. I'm typically a planner so I like to see what I would like to do and what my goals are going to be. That allows me to be mindful, review and reflect on where my energy is going and what I'm doing with it. The more in tune I am with myself, the easier it is to be flexible, joyful and redirect what doesn't work for me.
However, I also check up on the flow of how my life is going.
Questions I often ask myself are:
- Am I doing things in the right order?
- Am I getting signals I should change course?
- Am I getting signals I'm overlooking something?
For some people that can mean I suddenly 'choose to drop a subject', while for me there are obvious signals that things aren't right. I like to tell people that if you want pears, you can stand under the pear tree and shake the tree, but any pears that fall down are unripe, so it's better to wait until they are ready to let go.
Often I check the energy of the day, week or month and see what I can best do with it. It's sometimes pretty hard to let go of a project that I care about for a while, but it always turns out for the better. It's important to me that things are the 'right fit' and not just the first option or first chance.
A good example of this was when my husband was getting offers for the sale of his home. Naturally this process is very stressful, but I kept telling him the right person just hadn't showed up yet. He felt very anxious waiting, but in the end we have accepted the offer of the third person interested. It has been a blessing in so many ways, so he is now convinced that this is important.
Meeting the flow of your life is an important way to find yourself in the Flow regularly. It helps you feel what is right for you at the moment, releases you from obligation that don't work and helps you to stay flexible.
Exercise to check the flow of your life
- Make a list of what projects you feel are important
- Rank them in the order you think they should be done
- Ask Spirit/The Universe/God/your intuition to rank them in which order they should flow into your life.
- If you have trouble with the previous step, simple use a random number generator to rank them or write them down on separate cards, shuffle and draw the order
- What in the new order is surprising? Does it bring you any new knowledge or insights?
Flow of your body
Noticing the flow of your body - where are you at ease, where are you keeping tension, where are you looking for sustenance or for relaxation - immediately helps improve your life. A lot of people who do productivity work will try to find out at which times they are most productive and use that knowledge to optimize their schedules. There are also many books on how movement, body posture etc. can help us feel more relaxed, stronger, more motivated etc.
There are many ways to notice and work with the flow of your body and work with the energy you have or even raise it, instead of going against the flow and exhausting yourself. After you noticed what you need for your body, don't hesitate to give it to yourself.
Exercise to feel the flow of your body
- Make sure you aren't disturbed for 5-10 minutes
- Close your eyes
- Breath in and out in a relaxed fashion, slowing down your breath
- Give each of your body parts attention, starting from the feet up towards the top of your head
- Listen to each part and notice if it holds tension
- Feel how tired/thirsty/hungry your body is
- Feel the mood of your body, is it angry, relaxed, happy, joyful or....
- Do you notice any blockages?
- If you have a gift to give your body - what would it be?
- Slowly open your eyes
- Enjoy a bit of water, tea or something else to drink
A small list of what you might need could be:
- Give yourself enough sleep
- Give yourself enough food
- Give yourself enough relaxation
- Do some yoga
- Take a walk
- Do some other exercise
- Take a break
- Take a holiday
My favorite ways of body flow are getting regular massages (keeps me very well connected and grounded in where I hold tension) and jumping on my trampoline whenever I get annoyed with paperwork.
Want to share an intuitive story? Post a comment on the blog, LinkedIN, Facebook Fan Page or talk to me by e-mail or in the practice!
Today I'm writing some EFT sentences on manipulation. We all manipulate people even though we know that it isn't right. When we are afraid we won't get what we want or need, we might resort to guilt-tripping, sabotaging ourselves, victimhood or other negative behaviors. We are easy to manipulate when we refuse to see the truth, respond out of guilt, fear or shame or are afraid to lose someone or something. When we are manipulative, we might get what we want, but we don't feel good about it. When we are manipulated, we feel betrayed, upset and hurt.
So start clearing your pain and unhappiness connected to manipulation today and keep yourself from being easily manipulated. Start clearing your own manipulative tendencies to be happier with yourself and more confident in your dealings with others.
Manipulation of others
Even though I feel manipulation is the only way, I choose to find a healthier outletEven though I feel manipulation is the only way, I choose to walk an ethical path
Even though I feel manipulation is justified, I choose to find a healthier outlet
Even though I feel manipulation is easier, I choose to walk an ethical path
Manipulation tactics
Even though I want to be a victim, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to sabotage myself, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to pretend I'm helpless, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to have revenge, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to guilt trip <person X>, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to use my body, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to use my wiles, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Even though I want to have it my way regardless of the cost, I choose to let go of this manipulation tactic
Feeling manipulated
Even though I feel manipulated, I choose to stand strongEven though I feel manipulated, I choose to withstand manipulation
Even though I feel manipulated, I choose what's right for me
Releasing past manipulation by person
Even though I feel manipulated by <person X>, I choose to forgive and move on
Even though I feel manipulated by <person X>, forgive everybody involved
Even though I feel manipulated by <person X>, I accept the past and move on
Even though I feel manipulated by <person X>, I release myself and others from this cycle
Even though I feel manipulated by <person X>, I heal myself and others completely
Releasing past manipulation by feeling
Even though I feel manipulated by my guilt, I release my guilt and release myself from this cycle
Even though I feel manipulated by my shame, I release my shame and release myself from this cycle
Even though I feel manipulated by my fear, I release my fear and release myself from this cycle
Even though I feel manipulated by my anger, I release my anger and release myself from this cycle
Even though I feel manipulated by my <emotion>, I release my <emotion> and release myself from this cycle
Want to chat about moving on in a healing way? Post a message on the blog, Facebook Fan Page or e-mail me for a personalized EFT sentence!
Dear People,
For a lot of us, it's hard to work with our natural rhythm, the speed of movement that is right for us. Often, we want to move faster then our bodies, minds, heart or even energy bodies can cope with causing problems for ourselves. It's also possible that we are holding back, moving slower out of fear, which will also create problems. So that's why today's affirmations are about finding and maintaining your natural rhythm.
I write my affirmations in different levels so you can see what resonates with you and what you want to work on. You might start with a lower level that resonates and then move your way up.
Pick and choose what works for you and affirm away (I recommend three times a day if you can manage it).
I'm aware of my bodies natural rhythm
I'm aware of my hearts natural rhythm
I'm aware of my minds natural rhythm
I'm aware of my spirits natural rhythm
I listen to my bodies natural rhythm
I listen to my hearts natural rhythm
I listen to my minds natural rhythm
I listen to my spirits natural rhythm
I work with my bodies natural rhythm
I work with my hearts natural rhythm
I work with my minds natural rhythm
I work with my spirits natural rhythm
I appreciate my bodies natural rhythm
I appreciate my hearts natural rhythm
I appreciate my minds natural rhythm
I appreciate my spirits natural rhythm
I love my bodies natural rhythm
I love my hearts natural rhythm
I love my minds natural rhythm
I love my spirits natural rhythm
I live my life easily within my natural rhythm
I live my life joyfully within my natural rhythm
I live my life peacefully within my natural rhythm
I live my life gratefully within my natural rhythm
I live my life lovingly within my natural rhythm
Have an affirmation you want to share? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your affirmation stories in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.
I talked about the importance of grounding, to make sure you stay connected to your body and the now, but today I want to speak about cleansing. There are many situations where I recommend cleansing yourself. Today I'd be speaking about these situations and give you many ways to cleanse yourself. If you haven't done it before, a mindful cleansing ritual might give you that energy boost you've been waiting on.
When is cleansing necessary?
I would say cleansing is necessary when you feel that you need to do so. Some people have regular cleansing rituals, while others just connect with their own energy field to see when it's necessary. I regularly recommend cleansing to clients if I notice the energy field being weak or overwhelmed.
If you don't have time to check in with me or don't feel confident checking your own energy field, you can check the underlying list and see if you'd fit any of these situations:
- Your energy field is weak and you have picked up emotions/energy from others
- When you have been sick
- When you notice yourself being in moods/low energy/small complaints that don't seem to end
- When you have been very upset and it feels like you can't let go/move on
- When you went through a shocking situation
- When you've been in contact with toxic substances, toxic situations or toxic people
- When you want to take a new step and feel some of the old is still within you
Why would you cleanse?
When your energy field is strong it will process all your emotions, your energy and energy you pick up from outside sources (human, animal or objects) easily and fast. Sometimes things happen (see the list above) and your energy field becomes overwhelmed and then it's a matter of time before problems start occurring on the physical, emotional and mental planes.
Usually the energy field will balance and heal itself when you take actions that automatically help your field, but sometimes those aren't enough and a cleanse is the perfect way to boost yourself.
How can you cleanse?
There are many different ways to cleanse, so pick from the list what you like to see what kind of results you have. Generally cleansing works best when it's something that encourages your energy field to flow naturally (so a flow of water is better then sitting water), it's a way to tune into higher energy vibrations (access them with mantra's or intent) or it's a way to process energy faster (releasing through journalling or EFT)
Here is a list of things that you can try:
- Take a show
- Stream cold water past your arms/hands
- Stroking movements down your arms/legs
- Yoga
- Swimming
- Intent
- Affirmations
- Meditation/Visualisation
- Singing Bowls
- Drumming
- Mantra's
- Crystals (Selenite especially)
- Forest Bathing
- Journalling
- EFT
Want to share your own cleansing techniques or talk to me about cleansing? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your cleansing stories by e-mail or talk to me in the practice.
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 7 which was published on December 2nd 2018.
Ending in gratitude
Gratitude is the natural conclusion of this series of columns, because in this December month it always plays a huge role in our lives. We, of course, think of completing things at the end of the year, but are also grateful for all forms of light: dear friends or family, kind employers, our pets, etc.
When we look in gratitude at what we have accomplished, there is room for joy and positivity. Gratitude makes it clear why we wanted a certain result and gives us space to easier maintain goals or tackle them. If you know why you are doing what you are doing, it’s much easier to keep it up.
Always celebrate all things that go well, especially when you are busy with changes. Every step forward is one step you have made. It is easier to look at what could have been done better or different with a kind perspective if you practice gratitude. That helps us to refine or adjust goals while feeling joy. Far more often, people look in anger or frustration at what has failed and therefore slow themselves down or get mired in pain. We grow best in a positive environment, with compliments, gratitude and love. Give yourself that, but also don’t forget to share that with others.
So take the time to thank those people or things that have helped you. With a sweet compliment or with a special gesture that will warm their hearts and yours. It can be as simple as a small card or as elaborate as a great gift, but making the effort to make a gesture is all that is needed.
Bring even more positivity into your life by making gratitude a daily habit. By keeping a gratitude diary, in which you write 1 or more things every day, you begin to feel this positive force more consciously. In the beginning it may feel uncomfortable, but soon you will notice that many positive things happen to you and that focusing on them brings even more joy.
Thank you very much for reading these columns, may the New Year ensure that you can shine with heart and soul. Do you want help with changes? Then you know how to find me and my practice.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
Gratitude is the natural conclusion of this series of columns, because in this December month it always plays a huge role in our lives. We, of course, think of completing things at the end of the year, but are also grateful for all forms of light: dear friends or family, kind employers, our pets, etc.
When we look in gratitude at what we have accomplished, there is room for joy and positivity. Gratitude makes it clear why we wanted a certain result and gives us space to easier maintain goals or tackle them. If you know why you are doing what you are doing, it’s much easier to keep it up.
Always celebrate all things that go well, especially when you are busy with changes. Every step forward is one step you have made. It is easier to look at what could have been done better or different with a kind perspective if you practice gratitude. That helps us to refine or adjust goals while feeling joy. Far more often, people look in anger or frustration at what has failed and therefore slow themselves down or get mired in pain. We grow best in a positive environment, with compliments, gratitude and love. Give yourself that, but also don’t forget to share that with others.
So take the time to thank those people or things that have helped you. With a sweet compliment or with a special gesture that will warm their hearts and yours. It can be as simple as a small card or as elaborate as a great gift, but making the effort to make a gesture is all that is needed.
Bring even more positivity into your life by making gratitude a daily habit. By keeping a gratitude diary, in which you write 1 or more things every day, you begin to feel this positive force more consciously. In the beginning it may feel uncomfortable, but soon you will notice that many positive things happen to you and that focusing on them brings even more joy.
Thank you very much for reading these columns, may the New Year ensure that you can shine with heart and soul. Do you want help with changes? Then you know how to find me and my practice.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Celebrate things that go well
- Thank someone else
- Seek gratitude in every day
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 6 which was published on October 7th 2018.
The power of acceptance
During changes we often notice that our critical voice is very present: impatience and irritation are increased. We see what is going wrong in our efforts to change and that is what we want to change right now or better yet yesterday. If this voice is out of balance, the amount of negativity becomes overwhelming and our energy decreases.
So always take the time to temper your critical voice by keeping a kind perspective when looking at yourself. Any result that you are not happy with has, after all, yielded experience. There is reason we say: "We learn from our mistakes". Accept this voice, but let it always be respectful. Don’t let it insult or belittle you.
Get to know the opposite voice: the encouraging voice or the inner cheerleader. In many of us it is insufficiently developed as we haven’t received enough of it from teachers, parents or friends. We all need to have a voice that encourages us, comforts us if we have not succeeded and rejoices when there are results to be celebrated. Take the time to consciously call on this voice regularly, preferably after you have heard your critical voice.
Once both voices get attention, we will get a more balanced picture and that makes it easier for us to accept our path in life. Maybe you have made a detour, but then you have (possibly) seen something beautiful that you had missed otherwise or learned something important. Your path always differs from that of someone else, but that does not make it any less beautiful.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Temper your critical voice
- Get to know your inner cheerleader
- Accept yourself and your path
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 5 which was published on September 2nd 2018.
Growing by learning
In September the summer feeling starts to wear off and the schools start again: an excellent time to start learning again. We can always grow, regardless of our age and our stage of life. Everyone benefits when knowledge is increased!
Around this time, there are many courses, workshops and other activities that start again, making it interesting to look around at what’s happening in your city. Nowadays we are even able to learn from home, including at my practice through Hart en Ziel Education (edu.hartenziel-online.nl). That way you can get started with something new at your own pace and from the comfort of your home. Learning is fun and gives a lot of satisfaction and relaxation.
Of course you can learn something new, but it can also be very worthwhile to look at your weak spots. If you find it hard to stand up for yourself, have trouble with your weight or creating balance in your life, then looking for a workshop or course that matches this is a valuable opportunity for growth. It is also reassuring to see that others also have problems with something that really bothers you in yourself.
If you have taken steps to learn and grow, then it is equally important to also celebrate that growth. A positive view of yourself helps you to tackle things over and over again. So celebrate your growth by seeing your victories. The time you finally stood up for yourself, lost that kilo of weight or that relaxed day that you enjoyed so much: celebrate them in gratitude.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Access new knowledge
- Learn from your weak spots
- Celebrate your growth
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 4 which was published on August 5th 2018.
Reflection invites inspiration
If you have managed to get started this summer with more peace, happiness and energy, inspiration will automatically come into play. If there is more room in our lives, because it is not completely packed, there will be room to listen to ourselves again. There is also more inspiration available from outside sources when we have time to see them.
Especially during the summer period, many nice things are organised that can inspire us. Go to a fun festival or museum, take the time to read a book or watch a movie. Try your hand at a new skill by going to an interesting workshop or take the time to do something at home by yourself. Before you know it you notice that the positive energy asks you to make changes in your life.
If you really want to be sure that the changes are right for you, take a moment of reflection. Look at your routine; what is in there what might no longer belong or what do you miss? Reflect on your goals, do you have time and energy for them, and what have you achieved already? It can be painful to see what does not work, but it also gives you opportunities to make adjustments. If you are unable to adjust if you have already lost your way to yourself, you can of course choose to call in help.
Usually we find it difficult to create something new in our lives, because it all has to be perfect or because we want to be sure that it will work or fits well in our lives. The summer period invites you to just try something new and give yourself permission to see what happens. Enjoy!
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Get inspired
- Take a moment of reflection
- Try something new
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 3 which was published on July 1st 2018.
The tranquility of summer
The holiday time is a great time to live at a slower pace. The weather is good, there is more energy and people are therefore happier. Of course, many people want to fill their vacation time with all kinds of new projects or things that they haven’t had time for. Nevertheless, I always recommend people to take that extra rest in the summer, because that is paid triple in being less likely to get ill in autumn and winter.
So if you are always so happy with that holiday feeling, then it is time to create it at home. Give yourself an extra holiday this summer by giving yourself permission to do nothing and focus on enjoying. Talk to a friend, sit in the garden with your favourite book or take a nap.
If you want to experience that peacefulness, then it is time to reduce the tempo. Many people live at a much too high pace, so they overload their bodies and always feel that they are out of time. Summer invites you to have a slower pace, especially with warmth and it’s effects on our bodies, so get a bit slower to work or go for a leisurely walk instead of hurrying. Choose slower food (BBQ) or eat at a later, so you can cook at a more leisurely pace and give yourself more free time.
With that positivity and peace it becomes easier to tackle an irritation point, so choose something that bothers you and that you really want to change. That can be a room that needs to be cleaned up, the kilos that you want to get rid of or for example the relationship that you want to improve. Take a look at other articles on the blog for EFT sentences or affirmations to get started or call to discuss your irritation point and how to tackle it.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Free up time to enjoy
- Decrease your pace
- Tackle an irritation point
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 2 which was published on May 6th 2018.
The power of happiness
Last time I wrote about how to make a change successful and of course the first step was to create enough energy. Often, people with new energy want to get started right away, but keeping the energy level high is much more important. That is why today I will write about the biggest energy booster of life: happiness.
For many people, happiness is something that happens to you. You win something, someone gives you an unexpected compliment or you may receive a gift. That gives a nice boost, but you can also actively add happiness in your life. Do not wait for luck or happiness to find you, but actively search for it in your daily life.
An important way to make you feel happier is to think about things that you can derive happiness from. Daily gratitude is a ritual that shows you how much good you already have in your life. Gratitude for small things, such as a bird you hear whistling, but also for bigger things like friendship, love and safety helps you focus on the positive. When you practice gratitude mindfully, feelings of happiness grow and you remain more positive and energetic.
In order to make the right changes, it is important that we look critically at our lives, but that often means that people are focused on what they feel is not good enough. This makes it more difficult to be satisfied and at ease with ourselves. Satisfaction helps with quiet strong energy by focusing on what is successful, what was a good first attempt or what does go well. Regularly look around with satisfaction in your own life and notice the difference that it makes.
Finally, it is important to make yourself happy by doing and receiving fun and nice things. You can start quietly with a nice music setting or cooking something tasty, but of course by also visiting nice events or friends. Take some time to do things that are fun and happy and you will see that the other things in your life will run more smoothly as a result.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Be actively grateful every day
- Learn to be satisfied
- Make yourself happy
In 2018 I wrote 7 columns during the year for the Delft op Zondag newspaper to help people create a happier, healthier and more relaxed life by following my transformation plan. I've translated them from Dutch to English with small edits. If you rather read the Dutch versions, you can find them on my website. I'm sharing Column number 1 which was published on April 1st 2018.
A new start
In the spring time it’s natural that the itch to tackle things starts to bug us. Nowadays it can be tough to find the necessary extra energy to get things done, because of stress, goals and expectations. For many of us, daily life can already feel like a struggle.
The next coming months I will write 7 columns as a step-by-step plan to a happier, more relaxed life, based on my work at Hart en Ziel. During sessions people not only receive knowledge, but I also help permanently change behavior. I remove old emotions, thought patterns and other blockages.
My greatest wisdom to make a great new start is not to start making plans. First you have to create the energy you need. You need to tackling time and energy wasters. Where does time go that you would rather spend differently? Do you sometimes sit behind PC, TV or phone for too long? Do you help others at the expense of yourself? Remove time wasters and you will have enough energy left to start your new life. Permanently low in your energy? Then effectively organizing your day is even more important.
Divide your new project into feasible steps. Your motivation remains high and therefore so does your energy. So don’t start project: weight loss by going to the gym five times, because starting out nobody can keep that up. Start with some information, trial lessons, better food and more sleep and then you will notice that you get used to your new rhythm faster. Increase your gym time step by step.
It makes sense that occasionally things go wrong, so allow yourself your mistakes. Reflect at the end of the day or week where your energy and attention went. If something had higher priority, and you agree with that, please be satisfied with what you have done, even if it wasn’t what you initially wanted. Have you been distracted? Choose to do something about it, forgive yourself and move on.
Heart and Soul's transformation plan
- Create enough energy by tackling time wasters
- Make a feasible step-by-step plan
- Regularly reflect on your goals and adjust your behavior or your goals
Dear People,
Today I'm writing some EFT sentences to help release unhealthy patterns. Humans are being of habit and we often do things the same way even when they no longer suit us. We keep going to the same job, taking to the same friends and doing the same hobby's, because they are familiar and make us feel safe. However, sometimes we have changed too much or outgrown things, but find it hard to make changes that reflect that.
Another way of finding unhealthy patterns in our life, is when we keep doing something the same way, never getting the right results. We might even feel unlucky or even cursed to repeat things, but we can free ourselves.
Use these EFT sentences to work on letting go of your own unhealthy patterns.
Today I'm writing some EFT sentences to help release unhealthy patterns. Humans are being of habit and we often do things the same way even when they no longer suit us. We keep going to the same job, taking to the same friends and doing the same hobby's, because they are familiar and make us feel safe. However, sometimes we have changed too much or outgrown things, but find it hard to make changes that reflect that.
Another way of finding unhealthy patterns in our life, is when we keep doing something the same way, never getting the right results. We might even feel unlucky or even cursed to repeat things, but we can free ourselves.
Use these EFT sentences to work on letting go of your own unhealthy patterns.
Reflection
Even though I feel stuck, I'm willing to reflect on what needs to change
Even though changes make me uncomfortable, I'm willing to reflect on what needs to change
Even though I'm used to doing things this way, I'm open to finding new better ways
Even though I'm afraid I've outgrown things, I'm open to finding new better things
Even though I'm afraid I've outgrown relationships, I'm open to find new happier relationships
Even though I'm worried about changing, I happily change every day
Unhealthy pattern
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with money, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with friendships, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with family, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with love relationships, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with sex, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with my body, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I choose to change
Even though I feel guilty that I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I forgive myself completely
Even though I feel upset that I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I choose to move on
Even though changes make me uncomfortable, I'm willing to reflect on what needs to change
Even though I'm used to doing things this way, I'm open to finding new better ways
Even though I'm afraid I've outgrown things, I'm open to finding new better things
Even though I'm afraid I've outgrown relationships, I'm open to find new happier relationships
Even though I'm worried about changing, I happily change every day
Unhealthy pattern
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with money, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with friendships, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with family, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with love relationships, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with sex, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with my body, I choose to change
Even though I'm ashamed I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I choose to change
Even though I feel guilty that I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I forgive myself completely
Even though I feel upset that I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I choose to move on
Even though I feel hopeless about my unhealthy pattern with X, I trust that I can change
Even though I feel hurt that I have an unhealthy pattern with X, I let go
Even though I feel that an unhealthy pattern with X is part of my identify, I choose to transform
Even though I don't know how, I choose to build a healthy pattern
Even though I feel cursed with unhealthy pattern X, I free myself completely
New patterns
Even though I might still fall back into an unhealthy pattern, I celebrate all changes
Even though I have trouble sticking to the new pattern, I am proud of myself
Even though I feel discouraged about sticking to the new pattern, I give myself the encouragement I need
Even though I don't know who I am without unhealthy pattern X, I celebrate me
Even though I'm afraid of the new pattern, I choose to see the positive changes
Even though I fear I won't stick to the new pattern, I give myself time and effort
Even though I am worried about how others react, I want to stick to my new pattern
Even though the new pattern feels unfamiliar, I strive to make this healthy pattern a habit
Even though I might still fall back into an unhealthy pattern, I celebrate all changes
Even though I have trouble sticking to the new pattern, I am proud of myself
Even though I feel discouraged about sticking to the new pattern, I give myself the encouragement I need
Even though I don't know who I am without unhealthy pattern X, I celebrate me
Even though I'm afraid of the new pattern, I choose to see the positive changes
Even though I fear I won't stick to the new pattern, I give myself time and effort
Even though I am worried about how others react, I want to stick to my new pattern
Even though the new pattern feels unfamiliar, I strive to make this healthy pattern a habit
Want to chat about moving on in a healing way? Post a message on the blog, Facebook Fan Page or e-mail me for a personalized EFT sentence!
Dear People,
A lot of us want to be more creative in life or want to enjoy our creativity more. When we create, consciously or subconsciously, either light, beauty and joy enter our lives, because spirit moves through us, or pain, hurt and difficulty rises up, because ego manipulates us. I believe I'm a very creative person and I believe creativity is wonderful and the more we allow it in our lives, the better our lives become. So today I'm writing about it to help you create more wonder in your life.
I write my affirmations in different levels so you can see what resonates with you and what you want to work on. You might start with a lower level that resonates and then move your way up.
Pick and choose what works for you and affirm away (I recommend three times a day if you can manage it).
I choose to be open to the flow of creativity
I choose to open my heart to creativity
I choose to open my spirit to creativity
I choose to express my creativity without judgement
I choose to see myself as a creative spirit
I embrace my creativity
I honor my creativity
I creatively solve problems
I creatively solve difficulties
I creatively deal with obstacles
I creatively express my joy
I creatively express my happiness
I creatively express my wisdom
I creatively express my feelings
I creatively express my spirit
I see creativity in nature
I see creativity in others
I see creativity everywhere around me
I see creativity within me
I enjoy the creativity of nature
I enjoy the creativity of others
I enjoy creativity in my life
I enjoy my creativity
Have an affirmation you want to share? Don't hesitate to post it in a comment on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page. You can also share your affirmation stories in the practice, by e-mail or publicly online.